Nanoo Nanoo. This is the first in a series of irregular articles for the time tourist. You have paid your money and now you are enjoying the silly sights and sounds of the 21st century. There are a few things that you should be aware of.
First: Don’t Panic. Blue is a natural colour for the sky. And those things in the sky are called ‘clouds’.
While the historical records such as ‘Shortland Street’ and ‘Home and Away’ are very accurate, they do omit a few things. That white porcelain urn in its own little room is called a ‘toilet’ or ‘lavatory’. While they are never shown in historical records they must have some function as there are so many of them. Some houses and buildings have more than one. It is speculated they are either a religious altar or a place of meditation where the sound of rushing water calms the mind. People seem to get very upset if you use them as a source of drinking water.
Beware of the current medicine. They still believe that bacteria and viruses cause most diseases. Be very wary of surgeons, they still use knives. And we won’t even mention psychology.
Heterosexuality is still legal. It is not until 2051 that the United Nations Declaration of Speciation is passed. This is in response to scientists pointing out that male humans have more genetic commonality with a male chimpanzee than a human female. The recognition that females and males are different species leads to the realisation that heterosexuality is actuality a form of bestiality.
Masculinity still exists. While later it is recognised that masculinity is a psychiatric disorder that is easily treatable by a monthly dose of Phyroxodon, at this date the pharmacological community is not yet that advanced.
If you need some quick cash, the winning numbers for this weeks Lotto draw are 32, 6, 24, 10, 2, 36. Bonus number 27. Power ball 3.Good Luck.
Next time : Things to do in the 21st century.
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